Sex doesn't mean relationship or marriage. The "rude" message you left him, did you no favours, there was probably a better way to approach it. But the subsequent messages probably sealed your fate and made him run for the hills. I don't know how many messages you may have left, but I sense a neediness to them and he probably picked up on it. I think you've chased him enough and you should let it go. Not everyone wants a relationship but it's kind of obvious that you do. If that's the ultimate goal you have when you meet someone you are geniunely interested in then you're going to end up being your own worst enemy.

Try to relax and just take one encounter at a time for what it is. If there is a mutual attraction and you both feel you want to build on it, then great! But if you're trying to find a man to fit your dream then you're probably going to end up disappointed and alone. And 42 isn't old! You've got plenty of time. But I think the opportunity to explore your options with this guy is a done deal. Sorry.